BDSM-A-PALOOZA!

Get ready for as much good, kinky fun as you can handle!

On May 9 & 10 the superstars of BDSM erotic fiction shake it up at the Smutketeers blog!

There will be kink! There will be prizes! There will be authors galore!

Contributing authors:

SL-Scott Carpenter
Eden Bradley/Eve Berlin
Molly Weatherfield

Kallypso Masters
Cherise Sinclair
Saskia Walker
Annabel Joseph
Cassandra Carr
Sasha White
Shayla Black
Lolita Lopez
Eliza Gayle
Lissa Matthews
Kris Cook
Melissa Schroeder
Jayne Rylon
Portia Da Costa
Nationally Bestselling Author Lauren Dane

I'm Back

Yes it's been a while and in typical male fashion...I forgot to call, or post for that matter.
RT was a blast. I met a lot of new people and saw many friends I only see once a year.
The readers I met were great. I handed out a LOT of flash buttons but didn't get to flash anyone. I guess the law calls that indent exposure.

I plan to post a bunch of the pictures and send out the bag of goodies I picked up.
My DAWN also informed me I need to resend a package a winner of a contest didn't get.
I hate it when my package gets lost. Nothing sadder tan a man misplacing his package. That's why my wife puts mine in the freezer next to the frozen peas and carrots.

Long story.
So keep a look out for more posts about things.

I did have a question though.
The big topic at RT was the "50 SHADES OF GREY" books.
Have any of you read the book and what are your thoughts on it?
I'd love to hear about it.

Joke

TRIPLETS

A woman pregnant with triplets is walking down the street when a masked robber runs out the bank and shoots her three times in the stomach. 
Luckily the babies are okay. 
The surgeon decides to leave the bullets in because it's too risky to operate. 
All is fine for 16 years, and then one daughter walks into the room in tears. "What's wrong" asks the mother. 
"I was taking pee and this bullet came out" replies the daughter. 
The mother tells her it's okay and explains what happened 16 years ago. About a week later the second daughter walks in to the room in tears. "Mom, I was taking pee and this bullet came out". Again the mother tells her not to worry and explains what happened 16 years ago. 
A week later the boy walks into the room in tears. "It's okay" says the mom, "I know what happened, you were taking a pee and a bullet came out." 
"No," says the boy, "I was jerking off and I shot the dog."


24 HOURS


A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis, the man asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, and they make love. 
About six hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, "Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it one more time?" Of course, the wife agrees, and they do it again.
Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes that he now has only 8 hours left. He touches his wife shoulder, and asks, "Honey, please...just one more time before die." She says, "Of course, Dear," and they make love for the third time. 
After this session, the wife rolls over and falls asleep. The man, however, worried about his impending death, tosses and turns, until he's down to 4 more hours. 
He taps his wife, who rouses. "Honey, I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could..." 
At this point the wife sits up and says, "Listen, I have to get up in the morning. You don't!"

I'm HERE, not there, but HERE

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It's coming...stand back

Next week is RT.
One of my favorite conferences.
It's all about the thing I like.
Writing, eating bad food, art, lectures and hanging out in a bar until closing and talking to people about how all the sex scenes you write really happened.

I see my friends, authors, people I work with and mainly all the readers.
I LOVE talking to readers about what they like about the books.
You are all the reason why I write.

So remember if you see me there ask me to flash you.
That's right, I'm going to be there flashing people.
Hopefully the cops won't mind.

You'll all see what I mean when there.

I'm so excited.

Jokes

After three years of marriage, Kim was still questioning her husband about his lurid past.

"C'mon, tell me," she asked for the thousandth time, "how many women have you slept with?"

"Baby," he protested, "if I told you, you'd throw a fit".

Kim promised she wouldn't get angry, and convinced her hubby to tell her.

"Okay," he said, "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven - then there's you - nine, ten, 11, 12, 13..

A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, I bet you can't tell me something that will make me happy and sad at

the same time."

She said, "You have a bigger dick than all of your friends."

Tick Tock

Know it's been a while since I posted.

Not a lot of news other than the few conferences and places I went to.
Funny how little time you find for yourself when you're working all the time.
I have basically become a vampire and live on late nights.
At least I don't sparkle in the sunlight.

I had a lot of fun in Arizona and met a bunch of people.
Thanks to everyone that joined us in the St. Patricks Day blog hop.
All us writers had a lot of fun and I was happy to see all the comments made on my post and the poem.

It's coming up on that time again.

RT is next month.

I am looking forward to seeing all of you readers there.

I'll have a bunch of my buttons and whatever other kind of goodies I can dig up.

If you're going I'd love to hear who's going.

6 Old Ladies

One day, while walking to the store, I passed by a Nursing Home.  On the front lawn were 6 old ladies laying naked on the grass.  I thought this was a bit unusual, but continued on my way to the store.  On my return trip, I passed the same Nursing Home with the same 6 old ladies laying naked on the lawn.  This time my curiosity got the best of me and I went inside to talk to the manager.  "Do you know there are 6 ladies laying naked on your front lawn?"  "Yes," he said. "They are retired prostitutes and they're having a yard sale."

Take care,

Scott

And the winner is...

What a fantastic Blog Hop I hope you all had as much fun as I did, now let's pick a winner...

Congratulations latanya you have won a print copy of Tahoe Nights and your choice of backlist - Remember When.

Thank you everyone who participated and I hope to see you all around the blog again soon, don't forget to sign up for the newsletter, first hand news about special promotions, contests, and appearances.

Congratulations to all the other winners as well

Winner of the Kindle Fire or Nook Tablet:

#136 from Carrie Ann Ryan’s

Melissa L

Winner of the $90 Amazon or B&N Gift Card

#4186 from Wendy Smith’s Blog

Shadow

St. Patrick's Day Blog Hop

Want to win some books? Well today's your Luck day because me and 120 other authors are going to be telling you anything they can about being Irish, celebrating the day, wearing green, drinking green beer... pretty much anything!

Each author will be giving away a prize. Like a swag pack, gift cards, ebooks, print books, and so much more.

PLUS We have TWO Grand Prizes for TWO different winners! *gasp*

Grand Prize 1: Winner's Choice of a Kindle Fire or Nook Tablet

Grand Prize 2: Winner's Choice of a $90 Amazon or Barnes&Noble Gift Card

Isn't that exciting? LOL. So what do you have to do? Well, go to these websites and comment, stop by as many as you want. The grand prize winners will be chosen at random from the commenters - meaning you can comment on EACH blog - meaning 120 entries to the grand prize!!

Sounds great right? Come on over and wear your green and win some prizes!!!

So now that you know all the in and outs :) let's get started...

First I have a poem for you:

Silken Lady

A silken coat enhances her elegance,
casually clad, but warm and enfolding
her slim limbs in folds of furry fragrance;
green eyes gaze haughtily- a heart beholding.

She licks her lips, a pink tongue seen- disappears;
a lazy yawn, with blinking eyes, amazes,
her devoted audience she domineers.
A soft scream- hairs on end- her purr appraises.

Second I have a question for you:

What is it about Romance books that you enjoy reading?

and Third here is how you win my blog prize:

Leave me your answer to my question above, your choice from my backlist, and don't forget to leave your email address so that I can contact you when you win!

No need to follow my blog, Twitter, Facebook, or newsletter but I would love to have you follow. *Special contests for newsletter followers.

What's the prize:

A print copy of Tahoe Nights plus one ebook from my backlist



Happy Hopping :)